I always loved my body. not with a narcissist kind of love, but rather with a thoughtful appreciation for its strength and well-being. having good genetics, I never took it for granted and was working out since early age, literally so. when I turned 6 years old my dad started engaging me in his ritual of morning exercise. since then push-ups, squats and crunches became my every day routine. I hated it back then. years later I felt deep gratitude for this gift he gave me, and I use every opportunity to tell him that now.
I continued to exercise sporadically throughout my life, trying out all various kinds of workout, from weight lifting to yoga and aerobics. ironically, I notice I can afford doing it less regularly now because strong fitness base and muscle core was built in my teen years, it stays there and it doesn’t let me gain too much weight or loose shape. 20 years later, I still fit in the same clothes I wore when I was 16.
for me one of the big considerations and worries about childbirth was how my body will look during pregnancy and after. I was afraid to never have flat stomach again. I was horrified to have saggy boobs and was seriously considering not to breastfeed. when I did pregnancy test and saw it positive, I packed all my body-conscious dresses and skinny jeans into two large wardrobe bags and buried them in a storage until at least a year after labor. secretly, I googled “how long it takes to loose baby fat” and scrutinized post-pregnancy pictures of supermodels, while trying to keep my expectations low considering my age (I am 36, not 20 like many of them) and the fact that, well, I am actually not a supermodel.
but my body didn’t let me down. core muscles held pregnancy belly tight until about 7 month, when it finally made its appearance. every other day (accent on “other”, to be fair) I kept on doing light variation of yoga and stretching until my due date. I didn’t have any food cravings, but my appetite was good and ate a lot, without much restrictions – be that ice-cream at night or an extra portion of home made pasta (my husband’s specialty). nevertheless, right after labor I had only 10lb extra left in me.
to be honest, it was discouraging to see my belly right after labor and for the next two-three weeks – I was back to 7mo pregnant-self look, but without being pregnant. it was horrifying to see my core muscles forming a pyramid with breaking point in the center every time I secretly tried to do crunches and plank pose when my son was only 1mo. I tried to be patient and focus on a more important task, which was learning how to be a mother, not a post-patrum fit model. another month passed by and I felt ready for the gym. it was before my first OBGYN appointment, so I didn’t really get the green light to do so, but I really felt ready and recovered, and I was sort of craving it. I started off slowly, at first just 15min of relaxed cardio, gradually adding workout for different muscle groups to my routine. crunches, squats, plank pose – like in the good-old times. but something I used to do so effortlessly in the past was exhausting me within minutes. my own reflection in the mirror of the gym was not flattering – I couldn’t stand my own profile with a slouchy belly, it just didn’t feel like me. but I stubbornly kept on going. 45min workout 3 times a week. more rigorously than ever.
by the time Leo was 3 month old I unpacked the clothing stored until better (that is, skinnier) times. everything fit just like before, may be just tiny bit tighter around the waist. by the day Leo turned 4mo I was comfortable enough to stroll around nudist beach in Barcelona, and wore a sheer white body-conscious dress for our second wedding celebration we did in Europe at the end of August.
so was it good genetics? not sure, because my mom, though fit and slender now, gained 40lb extra during her pregnancy and struggled to get rid of it for several years after. having similar constitution, I believe what made the difference for me were the crunches, the squats and endless plank poses. as well as breastfeeding, I guess. also, a lot of fresh air walks with Leo, and carrying him up and down 3rd floor of our no-elevator loft building. and while my body is not exactly the same as it was before Leo, I am still showing off my flat stomach, with more pride than ever.
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