YAY&NAY BABY ITEMS

I really think that they should teach motherhood crash course in high-school. (may be it can be an elective?) because motherhood is like jumping from an airplane without knowing how to open a parachute – it’s as scary as it is exciting, and most of us figure it all out on our own, just because we have to. the amount of information and knowledge you gain daily since the moment you become pregnant and on, is simply incredible. in the age of Internet, it’s a way of self-education as well as of trial&error. I remember how difficult and confusing it was to put together a baby shower registry. what would I need? how is it called? which brand to go with? whose recommendations to follow? in the era of consumerism and over-supply, it’s easy to get lost and to overspend. of course, you can ask for advice but tastes and lifestyles differ, more so when it comes to raising a child.

throughout Leonardo’s first year I was making mental notes about usefulness and uselessness of this or that baby item and/or gear, putting a mental yay&nay list for future myself, if my second time around happens (which I surely hope it will!)

so here is my two cents on items you don’t need and items you absolutely must have, in random order my baby brain remembered them 🙂

NAY items:
– bassinet stroller: i can almost hear a surprised outcry of many on this one.. no bassinet stroller at all?? so where to lay down my newborn for daily walks at the park? this might be the most debated topic on baby gear subject. for me choosing the stroller has been a major headache for quite some time, during which we changed 3 strollers (JJ Cole, Bugaboo, YoYo), and none of them i really liked. my 2 cents on bassinet strollers in general: they are bulky, expensive, short-lived, but most importantly, they are not so comfortable or welcoming for a tiny newborn. it’s almost like putting him in a big crib – too much space around and the surface is just so hard and flat for someone who has been curled up inside your belly for months. now, this is not only my opinion but i am sure pretty much everyone who has kids would agree: newborns sleep best in a car, that is, in a car seat. the car seats are cosy, snuggly, easy to carry, and overall extremely useful if you are on the go (they turn into a rocker when you put them on the floor, you can carry them in your hand like a bag, put them on a restaurant chair turned upside down, even take them as carry-on on the plane). if you get wheels system for this car seat (most of them have it), then they turn into perfect, light-weight bassinet stroller and a perfect travel system. plus, you will use this car seat in your car for at least 2 years! (rare life span for any baby gear)
– diaper bag: I could never understand why one needs a separate bag for diapers.. especially if these bags are all so ugly! (as majority of them are) my fashion instinct was right – nope, you don’t need one. you can easily use your regular totes and backpacks, and carry travel changing pad (see must-have list!) with you instead. if you are a nerd (like i am!) you can also get a diaper organizing bag insert 🙂
– wipes warmer: as nice as it sounds to wipe your baby’s tender bottom with warm wet fabric, it’s completely unnecessary, takes a lot of space and dries the wipes out so they are not even usable anymore :/
– bottles sterilizer: ok, I might not be an expert on this one because I didn’t introduce Leo to bottle until he was 3mo. it actually happened while we were traveling, and bringing our huge bottle sterilizer with us was not an option. so we opted out for Medela microwave bags (that serve the same purpose) and ever since I doubted the necessity of the big electric brother. my two cents on it – you don’t really need it. unless you have a lot of free space at your kitchen counter and no microwave.
– gripe water: funny enough, if you google it most probably you will see that everyone agree on that – gripe water doesn’t help a colicky baby. (also, now I do believe that colicky baby is a myth as well) but when it’s a witching hour, and you are a first-time parent, and your baby is screaming on the top of his lungs – you just need to believe. so we got gripe water and we tried it. nope, it doesn’t work.
– sippy cup: until your baby can’t figure out how to drink from a regular cup – he doesn’t really need to drink water. by the time he needs water – he can actually figure out how to drink from a cup, or use a straw. so nope, you don’t really need the sippy cup, but it works as a temporary pacifier when you are in the go.
– shoes until 9-12mo: those cute little shoes of miniature size? 100% fashion trend and waste of money. plus a pain to put them on a wriggly baby that curls up his toes in protest! but they look so darn cute on the photos! hmm..
– bubble bath: let me just quote renown pediatrician Michael Cohen here: “Bubble bath equals soap. Soap plus skin equals dryness. Dryness equals itching. Itching equals irritation. No bubble bath equals no irritation”. word!
– wrist & ankle toys: sounds like such a good idea, but the thing is, when baby actually discovers his hands and feet – they become the best toys as they are, without additional adornment.
– food processor: I almost got one but then I took another look at my crowded kitchen counter and asked myself a question: do I really need yet another device to mash purees, steam and heat up food? while I already have blender, grinder, hand-held mixer, and microwave? I answered “no” and I never missed a thing. in fact, making home-made baby food is one of my favorite chores, and its easy without any food processor.
– walker: majority of pediatricians would agree with me on this one. your baby doesn’t need a walker, as well as a walker might be dangerous and is meant to be a “no-no” item. there is nothing you can do to speed up your baby’s learning curve when it comes to waking. nor there is any need to do so. he will walk when he is ready, period. don’t let yourself stress out comparing him to other babies or guidelines you find online. he will walk sooner or later, without this thing. and one day you will miss the time when we couldn’t walk.
– Sophie the Giraffe: if you don’t know yet what it is, you will definitely know soon enough. even if you don’t put this long-necked squeaky weather on your baby shower list, chances are you will get in anyways. people just love this rubbery giraffe, but i personally think that it’s a marketing stunt – yes, you do need a teether (please see my suggestion in the YAY items) but you don’t necessarily need this one. unless you absolutely love giraffes 🙂
– mittens: they look like tiny socks but are meant for your baby’s hands to prevent him from scratching himself. hmmm.. how about good old manicure for your little one? yes, i know, cutting minuscule fingernails might feel scary in the beginning but motherhood is a scary endeavor as it is, so you better get used to it and start practicing. i personally didn’t have any problems cutting my son’s nails since he was born – it’s actually way more difficult now when he is a wriggly toddler.
– changing table: unless you have no chest of drawers at home, or if you have so much space in your house that you don’t care. i actually don’t have

YAY items:

– car seat & wheels travel system: as an answer to NAY for bassinet stroller.. please see my reasoning above
– diaper genie: you might think you don’t need it during the first couple months when your baby only nurses, and even his number 2 smells like flowers (well, almost), but you will definitely want it when your baby starts solids.. unless you want to package these number 2 diapers in ziplock bags before putting them in a regular garbage bin.
– swaddles: 100% natural, with cool designs, the more the better. they are useful for so many things, from its primary purpose of swaddling to being: sun canopy for a stroller, towel, burpie, picnic blanket, summer blanket, beach sarong, head turban.. you name it! my two most favorite brands for stylish swaddles are: Modern Burlap and RouxRoo.
– co-cleeping cradle: this item might be short-loved but it’s one of these things that actually make a difference in the very beginning, allowing you and your baby to sleep better while staying close. I suggest going for something very traditional and simple (hanging cradle, for instance). I still miss having it next to my bed, and pictures of it bring some of the fondest memories of Leonardo’s first months when we were still getting to know each other. we had Kindekeklein crib from Netherland, and it’s one baby item i still regret giving away..
– electric swing/daybed: as much as we were (still are!) trying to avoid everything electric and overly modern, an electric swing we got as a heritage from one of fellow mamas from the neighborhood was probably one of our favorite and most useful baby g]ear during the first months. it was also the ugliest thing in the house, but hey! it worked magic when it came to soothing Leonardo to sleep, and letting me do my house chores, or simply nap next to him on a sofa while listening to that repeating tune over and over again.
– Woobanub paci (pacifier with a toy): Leo never got to like or need the pacifier, but for a short period of time it was a useful thing , especially during witching hours. now, babies are not silly, and they learn to push the paci out of the mouth around the same time they actually learn to suck on it. plus, most pacifiers fall off their mouth right after a baby falls asleep, and often it wakes them up. to keep pacifier stay put in the mouth without forcing it too much, Woobabnub attached a small plush toy to it that stays on baby’s chest, while serving the purpose of entertainment and placeholder. Leo loved his lion-Woobanub for the time-being.
– tummy tub: an amazing and simple European invention (that looks Japanese for some reason) that very few people know about. it looks like a plastic bucket, but don’t be fooled by the simplicity of its design. it’s well-thought and measured to be a safe and fun place for your little baby to be in the water all by himself (with very minimal help from you). it worked magic to soothe Leo during witching hours, as well as I believe it encouraged his agility and love of water.
– velcro swaddles: swaddling your baby to sleep during first 3 months is essential for his (and that is yours) good sleep. now, you would be surprised how strong these little bundles of joy are, so no matter how well you mastered the swaddling art they always manage to make it loose. I personally loved Velcro system as it was very minimal, convenient and secure – these swaddles stay put so your baby learns very quickly to quit fighting the restrain and just succumb to a very clear message: “It’s time to sleep!”
– activity mat: in my opinion, it’s the only toy you really need during first 3-5 months. having a curious one year old running around the house as i type this, I miss this compact and safe way to entertain him for hours. think about it as an exercise place, and softly insist on tummy time from early age (the earlier the better! we started as soon as Leonardo’s belly button healed around one month of age)
– bibdana: bib in a shape of bandana – one of a very few stylish solutions for baby’s maintenance – keeps clothing clean and dry, and looks cool with cool outfits you got for him!
– fresh food feeder: another underrated and generally unknown device we absolutely LOVED. it looks like a oversized pacifier, and works as one apart from it’s main function – introducing solid food to your baby. it has a sac which you can stuff with pretty much anything edible: apples, berries, rice, meat, etc. and let your baby chew on it and suck all the juices without choking hazard. again, I account Leonardo’s amazing eating habits to this little device which we carried with us everywhere until he learnt to chew on his own.
– sound soothers: simple and easy way to create home sleep-encouraging ambient wherever you go. we have sound of waves on the iPad, and we always out it on when Leonardo goes to bed so it works as a signal as well. alternative to it (which we also had) is the famous Sleeping Sheep (or other plush animal of your choice that has build-in sounds of relaxing nature).
– footed PJs/onesies: I’d say, next time around footed PJs would be the only type of clothing I would have for my baby is until he is 9-12mo. (that is, until he starts walking) just think about it: one thing to put on VS. top, pants, socks (ugh) and none of these stay put.
– electric breast pump: if you are planning to breastfeed – please get it! even if you are not planning to go to work right away. it helps to provoke milk supply (if you are struggling with it) or to get rid of oversupply (in my case) and start stocking up your freezer for the future. it’s times more efficient than hand pump!
– travel changing pad: unobtrusive and smart alternative to a diaper bag (which I added to my “nay” list). you always have a padded and clean surface to change your baby, with diapers and wipes at hand in a adjacent pocket. it doesn’t take much space and can fit in pretty much any bag bigger than a clutch.
– nasal Frida: the idea might turn you off (sucking off your baby’s nasal mucus doesn’t sound too appealing, does it?) but believe me, when this first cold happens, and your little one is cranky and miserable because of congestion, this little device will be your best friend.
– travel bed/playpen: despite our extensive travels (Leonardo has been on a plane 15 times during his first year of life) somehow this was the item we didn’t think we need. when Leo was 6mo we rented a place in Miami and the host, knowing that we are traveling with a baby, provided us with a brand new playpen he bought just for our stay. it was priceless! perfect night bed as well as a safe place for a baby to hang out during the day, be that inside or outside. we came back to New York and bought our own (BabyBjorn), and we travel with it every since.
– boppy pillow: another simple yet very useful an multifunctional thing. makes breastfeeding comfortable, and can also be used as a lounger or baby’s first armchair that gives 300 degrees support
– sling carrier: so incredibly easy to use and useful to have. despite its deceiving hippie appearance, i think it is actually designed for overachievers and multitasks: great for bonding with your child and/or rocking him to sleep while doing chores around the house, or strolling at the beach. just watch out: it’s pretty addictive for your baby (some babies refuse being in a stroller after being carried most of the time being snugged next to mama’s chest), as well as it might become an expensive fashion addiction (if you fall for collection different colors and fabrics of the slings, which could be quite pretty!)
– structural carrier: this is a must-have alternative for a stroller, which comes handy for short trips, museum visits (in many museums strollers are not allowed at all) or even fashion nights out (my husband and I went out on NY fashion week with 4mo Leo in a baby carrier). brand-wise, here you really have 3 choices – Ergo baby,Beco Gemini, or BabyBjorn. (in the order of popularity) most people vote for Ergo because it’s most long-lived one and comfortable: when you baby grows old enough to be carried on your back, you just switch back&front. Beco has the same option, but Beco’s straps are criss-crossed on the back, so when you switched them to be worn on the front quite often it doesn’t work for women with bigger breasts. I actually own both Beco (which is my on-the-go“ carrier i always keep in the car) and beautiful white mesh BabyBjorn One (which i love for the look, functionality and extreme comfort). if i need to choose one, i would go for BabyBjorn all over again (as i would do with many other products, simply because i really appreciate their smart and stylish minimalistic design)
– freestanding protective case for iPad: and iPad of course. iPads are great as baby’s first iProduct – they can watch their cartoons on it, as well as you can have their soothing music and sing-alongs there too. to make iPad a bit more baby-friendly and useful, freestanding fall-proof undestructable case is a must. i love Spec’s case with rubber arms – you can uses those for grabbing, your baby’s teething, as well as for hanging iPad in the places where your baby can’t reach it to swipe the screen away (you will be amazing how fast they learn all these iMoves!)
– changing pad: i mentioned in the NAY list that having the whole changing table with drawers might be unnecessary. however, changing your baby’s diapers will be your number 1 activity for quite some time, and you want to have a safe and comfortable place to do so. i learnt that it potentially be any place, if you have the changing pad. i have two of those: one for Leonardo’s nursery where i attached it to the regular desk table, and one in the living room, which i placed on a aluminum cart that used to be my equipment cart 🙂 also, i never used the straps of the pad in accordance with their purposed – fastening them around the baby every time i need to change him seemed like doubling the amount of work. you can never leave your baby unattended on the changing pad anyways. i actually used the straps to secure the pad to the surface/piece of furniture i place it on, because it’s important that it stays put. little tip: you can change location of the pad easily. i used to put it on my working desk next to me when i had to work on the computer. or next to the window so Leonardo could enjoy looking at the clouds.

in addition to the mentioned above, if you are expecting a summer baby, you might want to consider buying some summer-related items. I wrote about them previously in my “Summer Getaways” post: http://www.dreamingofleonardo.com/summer-getaways/

and finally for this who are interested in more details, my own (updated one year after!) Baby Shower registry can be seen here:
https://www.myregistry.com/baby-registry/Yulia-Pogodina-Nicolas-Ambrosio-Brooklyn-NY/816996

this is my 2 cents about baby gear, but i would very interested to hear your opinion or suggestions on the subject!